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AEW Rampage: Beach Break Results

Posted By: Jonny Knapp on Jan 29, 2022

AEW Rampage: Beach Break Results

It (was) Friday, I hope you knew what that meant! Good morning to all of you. Disclaimer, I am watching this at 7:30 AM in the UK because my dumb ass went for a nap at 11PM and didn't wake up until just now. But alas, you're not here for details on my sleeping pattern! You're here to find out what happened on AEW Rampage. So, with Excalibur, Taz, Ricky Starks and Chris Jericho on commentary, let's get straight to the wrestling!

Jon Moxley defeated Anthony Bowens w/ Max Caster via Pinfall (12:20)

Moxley kicks our show off in his home state! He makes his entrance through the crowd before Max Caster comes out with a well measure rap that wasn't too offensive but still pretty amusing and Mox attacks both men before the bell. He attacks Bowens with a brutal German Suplex and follows with stomps and chops as the crowd chant his name. He takes Bowens to the outside and although Anthony tries to escape, he gets tossed into the barricade. Aubrey berates Mox so he bows in apology to her and then he raises her hand to the crowd before continuing his assault on Bowens through the crowd. Anthony shows a little heart by fighting back but a chop to the windpipe from Mox soon shuts that down and before long we're back ringside with Mox using the Ring Post to keep Bowens in trouble. A chop to Moxley's chest gives Bowens a chance to get back into the match and he delivers some punches and chops to Mox back in the ring before trying to go after the left arm and shoulder of his opponent. He drops him with a Russian Leg Sweep but Mox then fights out of a Suplex with some knee strikes and then he just tosses Bowens down and delivers some brutal kicks. Caster grabs the leg and Bowens capitalises with a Discus Elbow and a Neckbreaker for two as we go to break with Jon Moxley in trouble.

The commercial is only 90 seconds and Bowens spends it remaining on top. He even tosses Mox to the outside and distracts the ref so Caster can get involved but Mox catches Bowens on the top rope and we return to watch Mox go for the Avalanche Paradigm Shift but Bowens fights out with a giant superplex for two and then delivers some elbows to Mox's head before Bowens goes for a flying nothing and almost gets caught with the Paradigm Shift. Instead, they battle and then Bowens gets tossed to the outside and he and Caster get hit with a Tope. Back in the ring though, Bowens gets back on top and hits his DDT from the middle rope and then both men brawl back and forth until Mox hits a Piledriver and somehow Bowens escapes at two! Mox follows up with some brutal elbows but then almost gets rolled up and then Bowens almost wins it with a huge kick and then gets another two from the Acclaim to Fame but Mox isn't about to lose in his hometown. He tells Bowens to hit him and Anthony obliges before it all goes crazy! Caster distracts Aubrey, Bowens grabs the Boombox, Aubrey catches him and confiscates the boombox but as she's taking it away, Caster tosses Bowens his chain. As he goes to use it, Mox hits him with a brutal Cutter and then Caster comes in and is taken out with the King Kong Lariat before Mox finishes Bowens with the Paradigm Shift for the 3. Great opening match and the crowd love it.

We head backstage to see Bryan Danielson is watching him very closely. They're saving that for Revolution, I think.

Nyla Rose Promo

Nyla calls out Ruby for a rematch on Wednesday. LFG.

Andrade Backstage

Excalibur tells us that Andrade has requested a camera crew and we find him and Jose outside of Sting's dressing room. I'm already laughing in anticipation. Andrade barges in and there's no Sting but he finds Darby and tells him he wants an assistant for Jose so offers him a contract. Darby can't keep a straight face and tells Andrade that he respects him as a wrestler but he's lost his mind. He follows up with pointing out that after having the life he has had; money doesn't mean a lot to him so he tells Andrade the business meeting is over. Jose tries to stop/intimidate him but Darby fishes out Sting's baseball bat from behind him and Andrade asks why he's so crazy before they leave whilst telling Darby then need to speak with his boss. This was comedy gold. 5 stars. I'm still laughing.

FTR (Cash Wheeler & Dax Harwood) w/ Tully Blanchard defeated The Nightmare Family (Brock Anderson & Lee Johnson) w/ Arn Anderson via Pinfall (10:22)

We get no entrances and the bell rings with Lee and Cash in the ring. They lock up but Lee's speed has Cash in a little trouble but Cash is stronger and wilier. Brock makes a blind tag and Lee hits a step up Hurricanrana and then Dax comes in off the tag. Dax said Arn wished he was his son instead of Brock so this battle will be interesting as we get some excellent back and forth technical wrestling. Both men wrestle like Arn so it's like wrestling yourself for these men. Brock eventually manages to get the better of the battle and then in comes Lee from a tag as The Nightmare Family take over. Lee runs wild and hits a Top Con Hilo and then an assisted dive onto each member of FTR on the outside before Lee hits a huge Crossbody Press from the top rope for a two as we go to break.

Cash and Dax hit a blind tag as soon as we do head to commercial and they take over by isolating Lee Johnson. They beat him down both in and outside of the ring as they exchange tags and show why they'll always be in the conversation for the best tag team of all time. Dax gets Lee in a Gory special and then we cut away from the action. When we return, Lee suddenly fires back with a Neckbreaker on Dax and then Brock comes in and so does Cash. It's all Brock Anderson though as he runs wild on both members of FTR and gets a Gut Wrench Powerbomb on Cash. He nearly wins it with a roll up exchange but then Lee tags in and Brock hits the DDT on Cash and Lee hits the Frog Splash and they're going to win until Cash's foot drops on the second rope. Outside the ring, Brock has a little moment with Tully which leads to Tully backing into Arn who lays him out with an elbow! Are we really going to get Tully vs Arn?! Back in the ring, Lee and Cash battle but Dax saves Cash with the tag and they hit the Spiked Piledriver on Lee to get the victory. This was really good! Lee and Brock levelled up here big time.

Thunder Rosa vs Mercedes Martinez Video Package

We get this match next week on Rampage and it's going to be great, I can feel it.

Serena Deeb Video Package

This is a really cool little video showing the damage Deeb did to Shida whilst we hear commentary talking about how brutal she was. This is all overlaid with Serena looking cool, calm and ready to take over this division. Please let 2022 be the year of the Professor!

Jade Cargill w/ Smart Mark Sterling defeated Julia Hart w/ Griff Garrison via Pinfall (2:28) to retain the TBS Championship

Julia Hart comes out with her cute little eyepatch. Jade Cargill comes out looking like the imposing monster she is. The bell rings and we get a lock up, Jade is too strong though, and then she flattens Julia with a Shoulder Tackle. Julia goes for a Crossbody and Jade catches her with a Backbreaker and then she just does Push ups in the middle of the ring. Julia rolls her up for one and then fires up with kicks and a handspring elbow only for Jade to hoist her up in an Electric Chair. Julia turns it onto a Hurricanrana (a bad one) and then Jade hits Julia's literal blind side with a Pump Kick, then hits the Jaded to get the win. Job done. All good apart from the slow motion Hurricanrana.

Mark Henry Main Event Interview

Matt Hardy says that Private Party beat Jurassic Express last year and he blames Christian Cage for their loss. And then we get a back and forth between Matt & Christian digging up the past. Isiah takes over from Matt to tell Cleveland they're getting their first championship celebration in years tonight when they pound Jungle Boy's ass and then JB retorts by telling Matt that Jurassic Express have beaten every formation the HFO can put forward and maybe Matt just can't lead a team to beat them. Luchasaurus has the line of the promo.

Jurassic Express (Jungle Boy & Luchasaurus) w/ Christian Cage defeated Private Party (Marq Quen & Isiah Kassidy) w/ Matt Hardy & The Blade via Pinfall (10:45) to retain the AEW World Tag Team Championships

Billy Ass and the Ass Boys are at ringside and they distract Jurassic Express on the entrance which allows Quen to take out Jungle Boy and then Isiah to hit the Tornado. They bring JB into the ring and the ref rings the bell just in time for Private Party to hit Gin & Juice on Jungle Boy whilst he's still wearing the title belt! He somehow kicks out at two and Isiah can't believe it! They carry on the attack, Quen tags in and they hit a Footstomp/ Neckbreaker Combo for two and then they tag once more and miss the Frog Splash/ Leg drop combo. Jungle Boy uses this to escape them and tag out to Luchasaurus who comes in with the hottest of hot tags only for Private Party to duck out of the ring to dodge it. He follows them out, tosses The Blade and Matt Hardy out of the way and then flattens Isiah on the apron. Isiah rolls in to distract the ref and when Luchasaurus catches Quen to Chokeslam him, Matt Hardy takes out Luchasaurus with a chair to the back of the knee as we head to break with carnage on the outside. Christian rushes over to help as Blade attacks the knee of the the big man. He succeeds but Private Party then go after it but Luchasaurus is too strong for Isiah. Private Party are resilient though and go back after it again and again as they isolate the big man and keep Jungle Boy off the apron. They continue to make quick tags whilst Luchasaurus is stuck in their corner with only one leg. Hardy and Blade also continue to get involved when they can.

We return to the action with Luchasaurus in the outside but Isiah misses a splash and then Quen eats a Clothesline. Luchasaurus heads back inside the ring and Matt tosses in Isiah to stop him. Both of Private Party grab onto a Dino leg each to try and stop him making the tag and they succeed but when they drag him back, Luchasaurus rolls through then hits both of them with a lariat to get to his partner and escape the match. In comes Jungle Boy and he manages to send both of Private Party to the outside before hitting three dives in a row on them to flatten them. He brings Kassidy into the ring but Isiah hits a 360 enzuigiri for two! Jungle Boy and Kassidy head to the top rope and then we get a move that I can't even begin to describe. A reverse Doomsday Device reversal perhaps? Insane. Somehow Kassidy kicks out though. Private Party come back into it with the Silly String on Luchasaurus but he's not legal and Jungle Boy gets Kassidy in the Snare Trap. Quen breaks it up with a Shooting Star press and then they go for Gin & Juice again but this time Jungle Boy reverses it with a Destroyer and then Quen eats the Thoracic Express double team to get the win. This was crazy.

After the match, Gunn Club jump in the ring and they attack Jurassic Express after throwing Christian into the Ring Steps to set up the next match. Jurassic Express vs The Ass Boys. Make Danhausen the special referee.

Well, apologies for the lateness but that's Rampage done. Hope you all have a great weekend. Follow me on twitter @Knapphausen if you want to tell me off for sleeping. Adios!

 

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