We open with a video package highlighting the Sami Zayn drama last week, encompassing farmer Brock and Heyman, amongst others.
Michael Cole and Pat McAfee welcome us to the Allstate Arena for SmackDown, brought to you by Progressive. Banks makes her way out first to a great digital pop and a nice, mild reaction from the crowd. Storm is already in the ring when Banks arrives. Storm is all bubbly and friendly as Shotzi makes her way out to new, heavy music. Out last but never least is the SmackDown Women's Champion, Charlotte Flair, who comes out to the best pop of the night so far. Shotzi and Storm start first. Storm uses a side headlock to take Shotzi down to the mat and begins to work on Shotzi's neck. Shotzi uses her legs to counter the move into a hold of her own. Storm scoots backwards and free and the two lock up again. Storm uses a left wrist lock to wrap up Shotzi, but the former Blackheart uses an arm breaker to gain some separation. Storm drops Shotzi with an elbow off a rebound. Banks is tagged in and looks to double team Shotzi with Storm, but Shotzi latches onto the ropes and tags in Flair. Banks, wearing Spider-Man themed gear, locks up with Flair and takes the advantage with an arm roll. Banks tags in Storm. Flair catches Storm with a big boot, then hits Banks with one to send Sasha flying off the apron. Storm counters a Flair grapple into a pin attempt but Shotzi makes the save. Shotzi is left standing before a dead crowd as we head to break.
We return from break. Flair and Shotzi use quick tags as Flair coaches her lesser-experienced partner. Together, the duo isolate Sasha Banks. The heels often take shots at Toni Storm to prevent a tag. Flair focuses her work on Banks neck with a cruel neck crank that looks incredibly painful. Banks uses a jawbreaker in an attempt to gain some separation but Flair shuts her down with a backbreaker followed by a pin attempt. Flair snaps at "Lil' Naitch" Charles Robinson, the ref, and accuses him of using a slow count. Flair gives way to Shotzi. Shotzi takes too long entering and Storm gets the hot tag. Shotzi misses a kick and Storm hits a pair of Atomic Drops! Storm with a pair of rights and a lariat. Storm stomps away at Shotzi in the corner. Storm looks for a Scoop Slam but Shotzi escapes and performs a standing switch. Shotzi tags in Flair, who uses a suplex toss to send Storm crashing down and rolling to the outside as we head to another break.
Back from our second break of the match. Flair and Storm are both down and struggling to regain their footing. Flair attempts to stop Storm from making the tag, but Banks comes in and takes Shotzi off the apron with a kick. Banks looks for the Backstabber but Flair counters; Banks continues the motion and connects with a dropkick. Banks counters a body slam attempt into a cross body for a close cover. Banks smirks at Flair and the two begin exchanging blows. The crowd is finally awake and behind both women, but not as hot as the digital crowd. Flair gains the upper hand briefly and looks for a back body drop. Banks floats over and rolls up for a two. Banks counters another Flair back body drop attempt into a bulldog! Banks climbs up top and Storm makes the blind tag. Banks dives but Flair ducks. Banks takes Shotzi down with a Backstabber. Flair sends Banks out of the ring, unaware that Storm's legal. Storm hits a diving cross body off the top for a two and a half! The arena's finally waking up. Flair sends Storm face-first into the middle turnbuckle, buying herself time to recover. Flair with a lower-rope foot choke for a few. Flair drags Storm into the middle of the ring, walks across Storm's torso and climbs up top. Flair's looking for her moonsault. Flair flips back; Storm moves so Flair floats through. Storm has it scouted and rolls up Flair, using her momentum to pin the champ!
Your Winners, Sasha Banks & Toni Storm!
Backstage, King Woods rests upon his throne with the Hand of the King, Sir Kofi, beside him. Various Superstars, ranging from Rick Boogs to Ricochet, are paying their respects to the King. The Usos walk up and mock the "cosplayers" (don't dis LARPing 'til you try it). The New Day challenge the Usos to another fight and it looks like we'll have that soon.
The Viking Raiders come out to that new theme of theirs--still not as fun as their original--and this match is up after this word from a few sponsors. After several segments and breaks, we finally have our short tag match. Shanky is showcased as a giant, using loud, painful chest slaps to redden the flesh of Erik and shoulder blocks to run over Ivar. Jinder takes his turn in the ring, focusing on Erik while cutting the ring in half. Eventually Erik escapes after a few long minutes of being worked over by both opponents and Ivar takes the hot tag in. Ivar stuns Jinder with a big right before planting Mahal with a side slam chained into a standing cross body. Ivar attacks Shanky, who no-sells, and Jinder attacks Ivar from behind. Ivar cartwheels off a lariat and lays out Jinder with one of his own. Erik eventually gets the tag and the duo perform their teammate-scoop-slam finisher. Mahal barely kicks out and tags in Shanky; Erik tags in Ivar and the two big men go at it. Erik slams Ivar into Shanky then lays Jinder out with a belly to belly toss. Ivar wraps up the map with a splash off the top on Shanky.
Your Winners, the Viking Raiders!
Megan looks to talk to Natalya about Xia Li and the events of last week. Natalya uses the time to state Xia Li isn't worth talking about, and can't step up to a legend like Natalya, before vaguely threatening violence against her.
Paul Heyman awaits at the entrance, Universal title in hand, and greets "my tribal chief" as the vehicle door opens. Brock Lesnar steps out, not Reigns, and Heyman gulps visibly. Lesnar makes slight banter before moving on.
Moss and Corbin make their way out to boos as the crowd's finally showing life. The ring is set up for Happy Talk, with the desk featuring Angela--Drew McIntyre's sword--shoved in the middle of it. Corbin attempts to lead people in a "happy if you know it, clap your hands" chant. Corbin announced the newest addition to Happy Talk--the desk with Drew McIntyre's sword, Angela, stuck in it. He mocks that it is a multi-toll, and can serve as a cheese cutter or hat holder. Madcap makes a joke: "What do you call Drew McIntyre when he leaves his sword behind in a desk? The Glasgow...ditz." Madcap makes a few more jokes at McIntyre's expense and, as usual, the jokes are met with a swamp of boos and, as expected, the banter leads to McIntyre entering and destroying the duo after they attempted to attack him. At one point Madcap attempts to remove the "sword from the desk," King Arthur style. Moss states he can't get it out and Corbin accuses him of doing an Adam Pearce impression. Moss states he's not messing around and can't remove it. Corbin gives it a shot and fails, too. Both men grab the sword and put all their strength into it--failing, of course. Only Drew McIntyre possessed the ability to remove the sword--which he then used to once again threaten to murder two individuals.
Prior to the match, Cesaro is ambushed. After a lengthy break we return and this match is officially under way. Cesaro nurses his ribs, bandaged, as Holland begins working Cesaro's midsection with a rib breaker and a sideways bow bend. Holland repeatedly contorts Cesaro's body and pushes his knee into Cesaro's ribs. Holland with a thrust shove to the ribs before locking in an abdominal stretch. Holland looks for a claw grip as well and Cesaro attempts to fight it off. Holland pounds Cesaro's ribs. Cesaro throws off a forearm uppercut and follows it up with a back body drop, gaining a few moments to breathe. The Swiss Cyborg rises and hits a spinning uppercut in the corner. Cesaro unloads on Holland before clotheslining him over the top rope to the outside. Cesaro follows Holland outside and sends Ridge in but is distracted twice by Sheamus. Holland catches Cesaro with a Powerslam as he enters, off the distraction, to put away Cesaro and pick up the win. After the match, Holland and Sheamus hit Cesaro with another cheap shot to the ribs
Your Winner, Ridge Holland!
As has been the trend this year, Naomi makes her way out to the ring. Naomi still wants her one-on-one with Deville. Naomi pulls out a list of things she wants for Christmas, with a match against Deville being the biggest one. Deville eventually makes her way out and the two exchange words. Deville threatens to fight, once again, but Shayna Baszler takes out Naomi's knee from behind! Deville calls for the bell and Baszler locks in a knee bar immediately. Mere moments later, however, Baszler finds her arrogance costing her as Naomi quickly rolls up the Queen of Spades.
Your Winner, Naomi!
The Hand of the King, Sir Kofi, and King Xavier Woods, First of His Name, make their way out for this main event match-up. We head to break. When we return, the Usos make their way out as Michael Cole reminds us that Heyman is still backstage, awaiting the arrival of the Tribal Chief. We start with Kofi and Jey. Side headlock from Uce leads to a shoulder block. Jey holds up a finger. Kofi hits an SOS early on but Jey kicks out at two. Kofi misses a tag between the Usos and Jey lays out Kofi with a big right. Kofi finds himself double-teamed often as Jimmy takes Kofi into the Uso corner and the duo utilize fast tags to work over the King's Man in their corner. Multiple quick tags, each followed often by a single strike, dominates the early part of our main event. "Main Event" Jey Uso gives way to Jimmy who uses a textbook sleeper. Kofi gains separation with a step-back Superkick! Both men are down and both look for tags. Uso distracts the ref, and the ref doesn't see Kofi tag in Xavier. The Usos double team Kofi as the ref kicks Xavier out of the ring and we head to break!
Back from the break. Woods finally is legal and clears house, using an Axe Kick to rock Jimmy and a Side Russian Leg Sweep to lay out Jey. The crowd pops hard for the King as he sends Jimmy over the top rope with a clothesline and follows it up with a Wrecking Ball dropkick to the outside! Woods sends Uso inside and climbs up top as McAfee compares Woods to Pat Mahomes in the 4th quarter last night. Woods surveys his kingdom and hits a skyscraper Leg Drop for a close two! He rivaled Ford's height record I think! Woods makes the tag to Kofi as the ref loses control and all four men go at it. Kofi misses Jimmy with a diving attack and looks for the SOS. Uso avoids; Kofi looks for the Trouble in Paradise but Jimmy counters with a Superkick and picks up a close two! Kingston and Woods use the same distraction technique to prevent the ref from seeing an Uso tag, allowing Kofi to end the match and pick up the win over the champs.
Your Winners, the New Day!
Backstage, Paul Heyman watches as a vehicle arrives. Heyman opens the driver's side door, greeting with "my tribal chief!" Roman exits on the opposite side of the vehicle, however, and tells Heyman to go with him to his (locker) room. We head to break. When we return, and after a lengthy entrance, Roman gets on the mic. Roman tells Heyman he's not the one because he disrespected Roman. And when you disrespect Roman, you disrespect the whole family. "So I'm going to ask a few questions I already asked and I figured I knew the answers to already but can I trust you, wise man?" The crowd gasps audibly. "I took a week off and it's not like I didn't see nothin', but I know everything that happens around here and last week you seemed a little shady to me. SO let's get this straight< i wanna know this--did you know Brock was gonna return at SummerSlam? Did you know Brock was gonna be at Madison Square Garden? Did you know that Brock's suspension was gonna be lifted?" Roman pauses, composing himself as the crowd hits a light "you screwed up chant." "Oh, you damn right he screwed up," Roman answers to laughs. Roman questions Heyman: "Are you a special counsel or are you an advocate?" Reigns stares down Heyman as the crowd chants "advocate."
Heyman retrieves a mic and takes his time, pinching the bridge of his nose as the crowd rips off a few various weak chants. Roman tells Heyman to acknowledge him with the truth before he says anything. "Why are you protecting Brock Lesnar from me?" Heyman grins nervously and stares at the crowd, semi-scared, before answering. "My tribal chief, I'm not protecting Brock Lesnar from you." He pauses, looks upwards and prays "help me" before continuing. "I'm protecting you from Brock Lesnar!" The crowd pops big at this as Roman seems to get more and more pissed with every passing second. Roman hugs Heyman as the Usos watch. "We the ones, man, and I thank you for your honesty. And I think you for forty years of service to my family, and you're fired." Roman releases Heyman and nods to the Usos. Roman attacks Heyman with a Superman Punch as the crowd pops huge! Roman and the Usos stand over the fallen Heyman. Roman asks for a steel chair, then tells Uso he wants another. Roman positions the chair beneath Heyman's face and grabs a second, preparing for a one-man con-chair-to.
Brock Lesnar comes out, blue flannel beneath denim overalls. Lesnar stares them down for a few moments before charging the ramp. Brock clashes with the Usos on the ramp, laying Jey out with an F5. Jimmy hits the Beast with a Superkick but Lesnar fires right back with an F5 for both Usos! Lesnar stalks the ring as the crowd loudly chants for Suplex City. Lesnar hits the ring and Roman pounds him repeatedly with the steel chair! Lesnar won't stay down! Lesnar's back to his feet, hoists the Tribal Chief up and hits the F5 on the universal Champion! McAfee goes hoarse as Chicago erupts! Lesnar picks up Reigns and hits a second F5! We end with Lesnar standing over a fallen Bloodline!