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Lance Archer defeated Jason Hotch via Pinfall (1:24)
Hotch comes out to Archers music but he's actually running away from Archer. He hits a Tope Suicida onto Lance and goes for a second and that's all the offence he gets. Archer destroys him with a Hellicoaster, a Reverse German Suplex among his offence. He hits the Blackout to finish the job.
The Bunny (w/Penelope Ford) defeated Laynie Luck via Pinfall (2:14)
The Bunny comes out with her new best friend, Penelope Ford, who gets involved with interference almost immediately. Bunny hits a couple of chops but then has to kick out of two roll up attempts from Laynie Luck. Bunny regains control and hits a running knee strike to set up for Down The Rabbit Hole and pins her.
Evil Uno w/ Stu Grayson & Colt Cabana defeated Alan “5” Angels w/ John Silver & 10 via Pinfall (6:14)
We get our first ever Dark Order vs Dark Order match in AEW history as the factions seemingly inevitable implosion looms over them. Uno offers a handshake to start the match and 5 reluctantly accepts but Uno tries to roll him up. 5 hits a dropkick and Uno retreats, not wanting to fight. Grayson talks him back into the ring and Uno takes control using his size but Alan Angels' speed soon helps him gain the upper hand for a while. This match has the weirdest atmosphere in AEW history as the crowd break into "Please Don't Fight" multiple times. Uno lays in some big shots but Angels has the speed advantage and clearly wants this fight more than his Dark Order teammate so is never kept down for long. 5 hits a lovely springboard moonsault to the outside at one point and now Uno looks like he might be in trouble. But then he flips a switch, he seems genuinely annoyed at Angels and throws him into the middle of the ring before hitting the Something Evil to pick up the pin. The arguments continue after the bell.
The Acclaimed (Max Caster & Anthony Bowens) defeated Robert Anthony & Shawn Dean via Pinfall (1:04)
Caster comes out with an AEW approved rap in one of the funniest bits of the year before he hits his actual rap and Caster just got over huge with me. All is forgiven. The Acclaimed attack as the bell rings before Bowens is left alone with Robert Anthony. He takes him down and then in comes Shawn who gets taken out. Bowens tags out and Caster hits the Mic Drop for the pin.
Joey Janela w/Nameless Woman defeated Lee Moriarty via Pinfall (8:36)
Janela comes out with the woman that helped him the other week by taking out Robert Anthony and Excalibur informs us that her name is still unknown. As the match starts, the crowd are very much behind Lee Moriarty as we go back and forth. Janela keeps getting beaten by the speed of his opponent until his lady friend throws Lee into the barricade when Aubrey Edwards isn't looking. From here Janela does take control until Moriarty spikes Janela headfirst with the arm drag. He hits the double foot stomp for a close two count and goes to do it again but gets caught with a superplex. Moriarty rolls out but gets hit with the Tope and returned to the ring but Moriarty then hits one of his own as we go back and forth once more. Janela gets a Piledriver out of nowhere but Lee kicks out. Lee manages to lock in a submission but Janela's lady manages to help him get his foot on the ropes and Janela hits the Death Valley Driver for the win. Excellent match for Lee Moriarty and Joey Janela here. After the match, Sonny Kiss returns and gets a couple of strikes in on Joey before he escapes from the ring and runs away. Sonny better kick his ass.
The Dark Order (Colt Cabana & Stu Grayson) w/ Evil Uno defeated Travis Titan & RSP via Pinfall (3:06)
Stu Grayson is in the ring but the crowd chant for Colt Cabana, Stu goes to tag him in but RSP stops that happening as he and Travis Titan take early control. They keep Stu in their corner making quick tags but Stu eventually escapes and makes the tag. Colt runs wild for his hometown before we get a Chicago Skyline on Titan for the pin after Grayson hits the Nightfall on RSP.
Big Swole Diamante in a 3 Strikes Match [First Fall - Pinfall: Diamante (2:37), Second Fall - Submission: Big Swole (2:59), Third Fall - Knockout: Big Swole(4:23)] (9:59)
Excalibur does a horrible job of explaining the rules of this one and I'm now confused of the rules so I'm not going to get into them. Swole has an early advantage and keeps on top of her opponent but when Swole goes for the Dirty Dancing before Diamante rolls her up to get the pinfall by holding the trunks. She hits her with a running knee straight away and stays on top. Diamante locks on a Leg Scissors but Swole makes the rope but then she is dragged back to the middle and locked into a chin lock as Diamante dominates her opponent. Swole manages to get out of it though and locks on a Heel Hook and Diamante taps straight away. We now move to a no DQ Knockout match as we go straight to weapons with a Kendo stick involved immediately. Diamante takes the advantage with a Hurricanrana and throws Swole into the barricade. She now goes for the chain that she's been talking about and using. She wraps it round her left and then gives Swole a huge body shot before whipping her with the chain. Swole fires up though and kicks the chain out of Diamante's hand before she gains control of the weapon. Swole wraps it around her right hand and goes after Diamante but Diamante beats her down outside the ring. Diamante pulls out some handcuffs and goes to lock Swole up but Swole hits the Dirty Dancing out of nowhere to get the knock out. This match was a little messy but also fun.
That's the smaller shows out of the way for the week and we head to Dynamite in Cincinnati tomorrow night. Follow me on twitter @0r4n93_C4551dy and I'll see you here tomorrow night to recap Jon Moxley vs Minoru Suzuki among other things.
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